WEDDINGS & SEAGULLS

I think people who say it's good luck if it rains on your wedding day are full of shit. It's not good luck. It sucks. Who wants to get married in the rain? They say it to make you feel better.
The same goes with getting shit on by a seagull. That's not good luck, either. I know because a seagull shit on me when I was in 7th grade. My class went to an amusement park for a field trip. The boy I liked was standing next to me as the seagull flew over my head. The shit sprayed across my face and neck and all over my arm. Some of it was on my lip. The boy jumped away from me. Everyone was laughing and pointing and telling me to lick my lips. Then the boy asked my best friend to go on the roller coaster with him.  

If it rains on your wedding day or you get shit on by a seagull, it's not good luck. It SUCKS ASS.